Guys! There’s so much joy in my heart right now. It’s been a great ride on the Goodbye, Mine series, one I’m glad many of you took with me. Last week, my favourite aunt called to ask who Mine is, she even tried to guilt-trip me into telling her…LOL. Yesterday as well, a friend of mine went, “Tell me who Mine is now, am I not your friend?” *chuckles*
“You can have Mine,” I repeated to the doctor. “You can have Mine, if you want.”
“Are you sure?”
“Yes, please.” I would be a fool not to realize it was over.
“Okay then, but I’ll have to come back for him.” The doctor said and left.
I’ll come back for him.
I’ll come back for him.
The doctor will come back for Mine.
Those were the thoughts buzzing like a swarm of bees in my head. Mine will no longer be mine. Mine will be someone else’s. I couldn’t bring myself to look at you. You clearly chose when the doctor was picked over me. You chose for me when you shattered my heart and ground it into powder. You chose when you let go of that vital part of me, the straw that has held us together all all along.
I wanted to be angry. Heck! I thought I’d be furious. I thought I’d be scared. I thought I’d be sad, but all I felt was, NOTHING.
When the doctor came for Mine, I started to doubt my decision.
Am I really ready to let go of Mine?
Am I ready to lose Mine after all these years together?
After all we’ve been through?
Is there nothing else that I can do to save us?
Surely, this can’t be the end of our ride? There must be something I can do. There should be a way to save us. We could work things out. We could be a great couple again. I can’t give up. I’ve never given up. Why now? Why Mine?
My head was full of questions. I looked to Mine for answers.
“Say something, Mine!”
“Don’t you love me anymore?”
“What about us, Mine?”
“What about all the happily ever after we talked about?”
“How could you stop loving me, Mine?”
“Why aren’t you fighting for me, Mine?”
“What about how I feel? My dreams?”
"Please, say something, Mine!"
My heart screamed at you in desperation. Then you whispered, straight to my heart, “You need this Gelax, you need to let go.”
“What?! What do you mean? What the heck do I need to let go of?” My heart spat back. “I need you, Mine! Can’t you see that?”
As you held my gaze with your tender eyes, I felt a lump in my throat. I swallowed hard to hold back the tears threatening to fall.
“You don’t need me, not anymore.” You whispered again.
“I’m not letting go, I can’t do it.“ I shook my head adamantly. “Please, please don’t leave me. I need you, Mine.” I pleaded, batting my eyelashes like a puppy. That always worked but not that day ’cause you repeated,
“You don’t need me anymore, Bee. You’ve got all that you need from me already.”
“How can you say that?” Now I was angry. “Wasn’t it you who gave up on me? Weren’t you the one who kept pushing me away?”
“Let me finish!” I interrupted.
“I built my world around you, my dreams, my career… I built everything around you, Mine.” I paused to catch my breath. “Damn you. After all the years we’ve been together and everything we’ve been through, what did I get in return?” I chuckled dryly.
“All I get is you throwing my heart away like it was nothing, and now you’re telling me I don’t need you anymore?”
“I’m sorry.” Mine said.
Frankly, I was taken aback by your words. It wasn’t what I’d expected. I was expecting you to shout at me. I thought you would throw my own share of the blame at me. I was the one who cheated after all. I was expecting everything else but this – an apology? I wanted to fight; I needed to fight you to feel better about letting you go!
“Bee, I’m sorry I hurt you and broke your heart, but that was the only way to get you to let go of me.” Mine said tenderly. He looked genuinely sad.
“We are done. It’s time we both moved on. There will be someone else for you but I’m afraid that person is no longer me.”
“I don’t want anybody else. Can’t you see that? All I want is you, Mine.”
“That’s not true, Bee and you know it. This…we, ended a while ago.”
I bit my lips. That’s true. I knew it was over between us, I just wasn’t ready to accept it. I thought living in denial and nursing hope of what I wasn’t even sure I wanted anymore would make things better.
“B…but did it have to end on a sad note?” Now, I wanted answers. “Did it have to end in hurt and betrayal? Was all that necessary for us to move on, Mine?”
“Such is life, Bee. Such is life.” Mine replied sadly.
I looked into Mine’s eyes and in that instance, I understood. Even though it hurt so badly; it was time to let go and move on. Mine and I were done for good. We were at the end of a somewhat great ride.
The doctor came in then and announced, “Time to go.” My heart broke again. “Can I hug him one last time?” I asked the doctor.
“Mine…” I called as I held you tight in my arms for the last time. “Thank you for everything. You will always be a part of my story.”
Mine nodded and followed the Doctor out of the door. As I watched the two of them leave, reality set in and it dawned on me… it’s really over.
In spite of the vacuum I felt in my heart as you left, I smiled and said out loud…
Thanks a zillion times for following this story to the end, it means a lot to me. Goodbye, Mine is a true story about how I had to let go of my laptop a couple of weeks ago. I know, sorry if you thought Mine was a man. *laughing* Mine was just a laptop guys, but I’m sure you enjoyed the series regardless. Right?
Personally, I’m very sentimental about things and people that have made impact in my life. No matter what they do, I don’t find it easy to let go, hence the birth of this long but intriguing story about the relationship I shared with my laptop. You may find it funny, but I get attached to objects that are even as simple as a pen (I’m sure there are a number of people like me out there, I can’t possibly be the only one).
Anyway, my hope is that you learn from this story that if something or someone’s vision is no longer aligned with yours, it might be the time to let go and say goodbye.
What really is the point in two people walking together if they’re going in different directions? “Can two walk together, unless they are agreed?” Amos 3:3, NKJV and remember, “When you let go you create space for something better.” – Anonymous
Thanks again for reading. Please share your thoughts and ask any question you might have about Me & Mine below.
Love, Bolaji Gelax.