Hey Stars! How are you today?
Hope it’s a sunny Sunday over there? It’s all bright and beautiful right here and what’s more, I’m at Gail’s place with Chime for some Sunday rice and stew.😋 Nigerians sure know how important Sunday rice is, and your girl can’t cook won’t cook to save her life!
Anyway, I thought to share what’s on my mind with you this sunny-day.
For a long time, I was so worked up about the fact that some of my close friends and family members haven’t been supporting my brand as much as I wanted. This got me really pissed because to know me is to know I have a brand called Gelax Chatroom. I literally never stop talking about it.
My colleagues, my friends, my boyfriends, my acquaintances never hear the last of it. My brand is basically all that makes up my thoughts and words. So naturally, I EXPECT the people I love and who claim to love me to take Gelax Chatroom as passionately as I do. Not just because it means a lot to me, but because, that’s what I would do about the things they are passionate about. Get my drift?
This was why not getting the same energy made me bitter and I didn’t even know!
A couple of weeks ago, someone on my contact list complained about it but I got defensive. Not long after, one of my closest buddies also made mention of it and, I explained it away. But I couldn’t shut out the nagging feeling that came after that.
How did I move from Miss Flowery to Miss Bitter? How? It didn’t make any sense.
I told myself it must be my menstrual cycle or hormonal imbalance or something, but I knew in my heart that I was only lying to myself.
I decided to cut the crap, sat me down and did a thorough soul search.
Gelax, what exactly is wrong with you? Why are you bitter? What happened to your light and fragrance? Where is Miss Flowery?
It didn’t take long to pin it down to these:
1. I was expecting people to be unto me as I was unto them.
2. Because they weren’t doing that, I STOPPED HELPING this set of people. I felt they didn’t deserve my support if I wasn’t getting theirs.
This realization made me sad and I cried.
I cried because I’m a preacher of (unconditional) love. I believe in loving people and supporting them because you can and not because of what you can get from them. And there I was, refusing to support people I care about because they weren’t supporting me.
It broke my heart and I had to pray to God for forgiveness. I knew how bitter I felt and there was no way I could pick myself up without God’s help, so I asked Him to help me to keep loving and supporting these ones who I felt weren’t supportive.
It was tough but, guess what?
I felt peace again. My light began to glow again. It was so beautiful that I felt stupid for ever losing that in the first place. And for what?
One thing God dropped in my heart during my soul-searching process was this question, “What have you done to deserve the people who do not know you personally, yet support your brand fiercely like it’s theirs?”
I was ashamed of myself.
Just this morning, I heard a Joel Osteen’s sermon on City FM. He was preaching about why we should help others accomplish their dreams in whatever way we can even while working on ours. He told the story of how Lakewood Church and his father helped a Spanish church with the construction of their building while Lakewood Church was still trying to raise developmental funds for itself.
And this dropped on my mind, “When you become a celebrity, can you possibly know 1/1000 of the fans who would be loyal to you and everything that pertains to you?”
My answer was a no brainer.
Also, last night, my mentor told me why I shouldn’t ever have bad attitude towards someone because I expect them to be or act in a certain way.
You see, we can’t always control what people do to us, but we sure have absolute control over how we react or let it affect us. I was vexed at these people for so long that it made me a bitter person. To think they might have had no idea whatsoever!
I was giving them double power; the power to get me annoyed and the ones power to rob me of my joy, peace, fragrance and glow.
Phew! That was definitely me losing way too much for not getting someone’s support. Isn’t it?
I don’t know why but I had a great imprint in my spirit to share this with my #Galaxy. I hope you make some sense out of my rambling. I hope you get the message. I hope you never lose your joy and light over what doesn’t really matter.
Above all, I pray you get all the love and support you need, and even when you don’t get it, I HOPE YOU NEVER LOSE YOURSELF.
Do have you a great Sunday and a wonderful new week.
I love you, now & always. ❤✨
Lmao.
So recently my ‘bestfriend’ posted the link to a book one of his friends wrote. In my 4 years of blogging, he has never posted any of my links. Like ever. I was really hurt tbh because I had given excuses for him over time. But I told myself, it’s one of those things. It’s up to me to keep believing in what I’m doing even in times when I want to give up.
Shrugs. Our gift will pave way for us last last.
I can imagine how that felt. Lol
It’s good we can laugh about it. We owe ourselves to keep pushing, no matter what.
Thanks for stopping by, dearest Star. ❤✨
An interesting and thought-provoking read. The first sermon – just not on the Mount, but on the Galaxy.
Personally, I fight an internal war within myself a lot of times. Because I am empathetic, I struggle with knowing how and when to cut people’s excesses, especially when I think they are taking advantage of my empathy or good nature.
But over time, I have to come to the realisation that the complacency and peace I feel within myself is the ultimate happiness I should strive for. it might not seem logical, but if it feels right within my soul, that’s OK by me.
Nice one, Gelax.
Hahahaaa… Ser-what? No jor! 😂
Happiness is paramount, we all should always strive for it.
Thank you plenty plenty plenty. ❤✨
I have been in this kinda situation before and I am not sure I managed it well until I had the same experience just like you and I had to forgive and myself first and then others. Nice one SMP
It takes great strength not to overreact in such situations. I might have done worse than I painted it to seem like 😂
Thanks plenty plenty plenty, Ademola omo oba! ❤✨
complained to my sister about this friend of mine that doesn’t really support me and how annoying it is that i carry her own business on my head, my sister told me to either talk to her about it or take my mind off it and focus on the other nice things she does for me. i chose to do that and pray away the resentment, i felt better afterwards. thank you for sharing Gelax. Love and Light.
That was a good advice your sister gave you.
Thank you so much for reading and commenting, Anon. ❤✨
All the people close to me only my father reads my blog, and he comes for the political theories. He wonders how I got creative, have people who ask how comes you no longer share your links I simply arrogantly tell them my site is where it is. My ex used to read and I inspired her to start her own blog. Now I only look to strangers who come through and the blogging communities. When those close to me question my spending I tell them am a writer remember
Boy, boy! Firstly, I think you are lucky to have a father who checks in on your blog. I’d trip if mine did.
Did your ex stop reading your blog because you guys are exes? Actually, I shouldn’t be surprised. Mine did before we even broke up…phew!
Take heart Ben, after all, a prophet has no honour in his own country. ❤✨
I think she reads because when I put out an article these days it’s like a wildfire
LOL… Good of her then.
She is more of dead to me
Oops!🤭
Was it that bad?
Yes
This is an emotional wake up call.
It’s hard not to get mad and bitter at close pals for not supporting what we do.
We are humans after-all and we need all the support system we can get.
But like you said, we shouldn’t allow people rob us of our inner peace by being resentful.
Thank you for this timely message of love and forgiveness.
Yes please, it’s not always worth it at the end of the day.
Thank you more for reading and commenting, Ayobami.
You are a Star! ❤✨
Dear Gelax I can totally relate.
I won’t lie I have been in that bitter-leaf state for some time but I have come to realize that my happiness should not depend on others, whether they support or not.
I love that I have strangers and new acquaintance follow and commend my effort.
I have stopped beefing anyone who doesn’t support or encourage me, I won’t stop pushing though neither will I stop helping too.
It absolutely shouldn’t. It’s tough but we have to learn that.
I’m glad you are in a better head space. I love your work, and I commend your efforts. ❤✨
Your brand is yours for flying! Whether they cheer or not, it’s your brand anyways! I get it cut deep to feel loved ones nonchalant attitude to our brainchild. We often take those close to our heart for granted, lying to our self, they’ll understand.
God give me the grace not to take this amazing blog for granted. Gelax will not understand ☺ That said…It’s a sweet thing you find peace within yourself. Bitter is sour o jare!
Miss Flowery all day…everyday is best. Make dem park well.
Ah Kachi, come and marry me already now! Thank you plenty plenty plenty. ❤✨
My People will come see your people soon!😁
💃 💃 💃
This struck a chord no doubt!
Carrying people’s matter on your head and them not doing same (or same as you expect), e dey pain o!
Like how I would celebrate some people on their birthdays and they’ll not even cough a ‘hi’ to me on mine; and it was causing me depression! Nonsense and ingredients!
I’ve learnt to do what I can, even what I’d love others to do to me but to never expect a reciprocation. I shouldn’t be doing stuff for people because they should or will repay me but because I have the capacity. (I’m probably guilty of not reciprocating with others too so WTH!)
It’s really liberating reaching that place of peace and acceptance. Letting it go!
I know right, gosh!
I’m glad I’m in a better head space now and glad for you too. It can be so mentally draining to have ones expectations of people not me.
Thanks, Archi-Poet. I wish you more ❤ & ✨